Shock and Thoughts

Hello everyone.

This summer I had an emotional shock. I met my biological father for the first time.

Now it was very brief, however that does not make it any less shocking. Growing up I knew I was adopted on my fathers side. He even waited until I was six to ask if I wanted to be (mom married him when I was 2-3ish), which I really appreciate to this day.

My Dad and I at my Graduation. I love you dad!

I have never really felt the urge to meet my biological father. Why would I? I already have an amazing dad that loves me no matter what. I have a family that cares about me. A life that is full of love. Why bother with someone that I had never met (that I can remember)?

I still don't have an answer and I don't expect I ever will. I never expected to ever meet him. So I was super shocked when I did.

I was at Monroe park, helping my boyfriends mom with the Fun For All program. I had sat down for a bit when a stranger came up to me. He called me by my name, I said hello, and then he gave me a rock. He then walked off. I sat for a moment, thinking. How did this guy know my name? The only stranger I could think of that would know my name would be my biological father. Naturally this freaked me out, so I got up and told Patrick (my bf), and stayed near him and people I knew. We then told Patrick's mom who went over to the stranger to see if it really was who I thought it was.

She came back over and confirmed that it was indeed him. At that point is where I had my emotional breakdown. As in full out crying. I had met the one person I never thought I would. I had said hello to him. I wasn't prepared or anything. Why did he have to present himself now?

I saw him at the park once more after that. He didn't come over to me again thankfully. I still don't know whether or not I am ready to actually sit down and really talk to him. I don't know if I ever will be. In a way I do, find out why he never bothered to care about me until I turned older. Ask questions about his family. That's another thing. It boggles my mind that I have this whole other family that may or may not know about me. If they do, do they even want to meet me?

Other than that, I really have no desire to meet him again. Like I said, why would I? I have everything I need already.

Family and I at my graduation 2 years ago

What do you guys think? Should I wait until I feel I am absolutely ready to speak with him, or wait until the next time he randomly comes to talk to me, or talk to him now?

Until next time!
~Bri